


Veneficus

by Jen Hall (Greenlady)



Series: The Seidhrman [2]
Category: Starsky & Hutch
Genre: Alternate Universe, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-09-22
Updated: 2010-09-22
Packaged: 2017-10-12 02:43:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,158
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/119899
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Greenlady/pseuds/Jen%20Hall
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Starsky claims Hutch as his mate.</p><p>Please note that this series is set in an Alternate Universe.  Violence is much more accepted in this world than in our own.  Also, the people speak a weird -- to us -- bastardized form of Latin.  NOT classical Latin at all.  Any Latin scholars would be horrified.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Veneficus

It was dark when Starsky awoke, and for a moment he felt disoriented. Then he remembered that it would go on being dark for some weeks yet. He allowed himself to wonder why he had ever come to this Gods-accursed place.

Outside the cave, someone started singing in a beautiful voice, light, warm and erotic. The sound went straight to his grievously neglected groin. Oh, yes. Long nights had their reward, and Starsky expected to get his before this one was over.

Last night... well, before he went to sleep, anyway... he had tried to get a little farther than kisses with his host, despite the fact that he had still been too tired for real love games. Hutchinson had smiled and brushed off Starsky's amorous advances easily enough. Underneath it, though, Starsky had sensed a more basic reluctance, coupled with an even more basic innocence. Where had this man been living?

Hutchinson was a curious combination of sophistication and innocence, warmth and coolness. At one moment he would smile and Starsky's temperature would rise. The next, he would turn icy enough to cool anyone's ardour. Well, anyone's but Starsky's. It took more than a few frowns to accomplish that.

Starsky poked his head out of the cave, and tried to see something of what was going on, by the light of the stars and the bonfire. There was no sign of Hutchinson, but Starsky ventured outside anyway. He could scarcely cower in this hole forever, expecting Hutchinson to hold his hand whenever he needed to go outside. He found a place behind a rock to relieve himself, then looked around to see if his host had made a reappearance.

'Hutchinson?'

'In here,' was the answer.

'In where?'

'In another cave, behind you and to your right. Just follow my voice. I'm heating up the sauna. Can you see the light now?'

'Sauna?'

'Yes. I built one as soon as I got here. Can't stand to be dirty. There were other reasons as well.'

In the centre of the small cave, stood a Greek God come down to earth. A naked Greek God, poking into a pit with a stick.

'Hel-lo, there!' Starsky ventured. 'You want to poke at me with that stick? Or paddle me with it?'

Hutchinson looked up, coolly.

'Ah! There you are. Come inside, please, and pull the door closed. Take your clothes off, and put them on that bench.'

'Sure thing,' said Starsky. There was a rather primitive door, built with sapling wood. Starsky pulled it closed, then undressed. Hutchinson was too busy to notice. Starsky came up behind him, and slid his arms around the firm waist, then let his hands trail down....

Hutchinson gently pushed his hands away and turned to look at Starsky.

'Behave! This is a sauna. In Norway.'

'Yes? So?'

'Not a bathhouse in Babylon.'

'Oh. Sorry.'

Hutchinson looked disgusted by the very concept of Babylonian bathhouses, so Starsky decided not to entertain him with some of his adventures in one or two. Perhaps he shouldn't describe his visits to some of the Babylonian whorehouses either, especially the orgy rooms. This man would be a big hit in one of those, but looked as if he had never been in one. He might not even know such places existed.

This was going to be fun.

Starsky looked down into the pit to see what Hutchinson had been poking at.

'Ooh! Big red rocks.'

Hutchinson frowned.

'Could you just restrain yourself, and sit there.'

'Oh. I see. If you want to be Daddy, I could let you. For now.'

On journey by sea to Norway, the ship had sailed through a pack of icebergs. It was the chilliest sight Starsky had ever seen. Until now. 'I don't play games,' said Hutchinson. He bent down, lifted a water skin and poured the contents over the hot stones. Steam rose from them. Starsky knew just how they felt. Hutchinson sat on one of the logs he had arranged around the stone pit.

'If you want to stay,' he said, 'Sit there.' He pointed at the log on the other side of the pit. Starsky chose the log next to Hutchinson's instead. Hutchinson pretended not to notice. The light from the stones and a few candles was enough for him to see that Hutchinson's body was gloriously beautiful. Blond. All over. Wide shoulders. Flat belly. Long, long legs. And between them....

Starsky sighed. Hutchinson laughed. Starsky looked up, irritated.

Hutchinson said, 'Don't you ever think about anything else?'

'What do you know about it?'

'I could tell, soon as we met.'

'Tell what?'

'That you were going to be a handful.'

Starsky laughed one of his dirtiest laughs. 'Sweetheart, I'm more than a handful. Here, have a good, long look. You missed it when I stripped. But you aren't bad yourself.'

Silence.

'Oh, come on!'

'Hush. The steam is rising. I put some sacred herbs in the water. Let them relax you.'

'I don't want to relax. I want to fuck!'

'Then leave.'

Hutchinson's voice was icy again. Starsky sighed, and closed his eyes. It looked as if he'd have better luck with a Vestal Virgin than with his host in this mood.

The little cave was hot now, filled with smoke and the overpowering scent of herbs. Starsky felt dizzy. He looked over at Hutchinson, and the hair on the back of his neck stood up. Hutchinson was sitting cross-legged, his hands resting on his knees. His eyes were open, but the pupils had rolled up in his head or something, because his eyes looked white and glassy. He was swaying in circles where he sat, around and around, as if in a trance.

A trance! That was it. When they first met, Hutchinson had told him that he had visions, and called himself something, what was it? Some Norwegian word. No matter. Like a seer he had said. A seer. A mage. The smoke and the steam were about to bring on a vision. Starsky had seen some of the great Seers lost in visions, but always in public performances in the temples, under controlled conditions. The Magi at Babylon. The Sibyl. The Oracle at Delphi. These had been terrifying experiences, but there had been experts around to handle any problems that arose.

The Otherworld could come through the Gates and attack under conditions like these, and Starsky had never studied how to fight demons and evil spirits. He was a good soldier, and knew how to fight with ordinary weapons. Swords, knives, guns, were his metier, but not spells. He wore magic charms around his neck, but would they work here and now? Starsky prayed, fervidly, that they would.

The smoke and steam were rising higher, and Starsky felt dizzier. He laughed a little to himself. Certainly this was not how he had intended to spend time with this man. But Hutchinson's body was still beautiful, and this whole experience was stirring in its own way. There was an Otherworldy feel to the cave already. Something might come up from the fire pit, or break down the fragile door. He and Hutchinson must stick together, to fight any threat. They would be alone, against all the forces of evil. Partners.

Starsky thought about some of the new ideas that were making the rounds among the intellectuals of the time. He was no intellectual, but he had bedded a few, and Starsky liked some conversation along with his sex. A few of these men and women had remained friends after the affair was over, and Starsky visited in their homes and had occasionally taken part in Symposiums.

Among the new ideas discussed, was one that had highly amused Starsky at the time. But then, he had never considered that answering the questions raised would have any practical value in his life.

The question was, whether or not the Otherworld existed. Or was it merely superstition? Many intellectuals were raising the possibility that something that could not be seen or investigated through scientific investigation did not really exist.

Starsky had debated, with a certain amount of amused horror, the possibility that there was no such thing as love, then. For it could not be proven. The other members of the Symposium had cheered, and he had been regarded as having made his point.

Love. Starsky had searched for Love in many forms and in many places, but had found nothing lasting. He was nearly 25 years old now. Would he spend the rest of his life searching?

Starsky loved men. He loved women. Perhaps that was the problem, as no lover could be both. Well, except for hermaphrodites, who were rare, and to whom Starsky did not feel sexually attracted.

When he visited the Oracle at Delphi, that was the question he had asked. Who would be his ideal lover? Starsky had not known what to make of the answer he had gotten, but then few did, until it was too late.

The world tilted and swung about them wildly, until Starsky felt ill, then righted itself. Starsky opened his eyes and looked at Hutchinson. No, wait, he thought. He closed his eyes, then opened them again, quickly. What should not be there, still was there.

She was beautiful, as the man who had once occupied the seat next to Starsky had been beautiful. Blonde hair. Large, firm breasts. Long, long legs. A face to launch a thousand ships.

Pale blue eyes, that regarded Starsky much as they would have regarded a bug in her soup. Clearly, Starsky's chances had not changed along with Hutchinson's gender. Hutchinson's gender... Wait!

Starsky looked down at his own lap, and was relieved to see that he, at least, was still male. Vibrantly so. Well, at least he was until Hutchinson decided to geld him.

Hutchinson looked down at his female body and sighed.

'Wonderful! How did this happen?'

'Well, if you don't know....'

Hutchinson looked toward the cave entrance, and Starsky followed his glance. Sunlight was streaming in through the doorway.

'Yes, I see. We've been kidnapped. Kidnapped and brought to the Otherworld.'

Starsky reeled. 'How? Why?'

'As to how, the most likely explanation is by the actions of an evil veneficus.'

'A sorcerer!'

'But why? Good question. This may have been an accident, but perhaps one of us has an enemy?'

Hutchinson looked at Starsky, the question clear on his, er her, face.

'Oh, quite likely. The list is probably extensive and varied.'

'Injured spouses? People you've insulted in your career in the Vigil Militarius?'

'For a start.'

'Well, I have enemies too. But we won't get into that right now.'

'Okay, but just tell me why you're a woman now, please?'

'I'm a woman now, because we're in the Otherworld. This is the form I have here.'

'But....'

'Never mind. It's not important.'

 

They dressed in the clothes they had left on the bench just inside the door. Hutchinson said, 'Bring all the water skins with you. I think there's quite a lot left. We must not eat or drink anything here in the Otherworld, or we'll never be able to leave. But the water from our own world is safe. Well, let's get going.'

'Going where?'

'If we were brought here by an evil veneficus, intentionally for some nefarious purpose, we can't just wait around to be attacked. We need to find out who did this and why. Perhaps there is some evidence, so that we can lay charges of evil sorcery against him.'

'Him? You're sure it's a him?'

'Not really. Could be a woman. Makes little difference.'

'Oh, I wouldn't say that.'

It was wonderful to see sunshine again, even under these conditions. The sunlight in the Otherworld was a little strange, however. Brighter, perhaps. The sky was also bluer, and the grass greener. The wind rustled in the trees with an almost feral quality.

A loud caw made Starsky jump, but Hutchinson smiled for the first time since they had arrived here. A large black bird flew down out of one of the trees and landed on Hutchinson's shoulder.

'Viggo,' she said, happily.

'Viggo? How'd he get here? And isn't he a wolf?'

'Viggo is my familiar. He follows me everywhere, and can take any form, in any of the Otherworlds.'

'Otherworlds? There are more than one?'

'Of course. There are many worlds, all connected, like branches, along the trunk of the World Tree. Yggdrasil.'

'Bless you!'

'What? Oh! No, Yggdrasil is the name of the World Tree. We have moved along to another of its branches, but I'm not sure which one. I haven't been to them all yet.'

'And here I thought I was well-travelled. So, which direction do we go?'

'Well, where would you hide if you were a veneficus?'

'In the north. It's less populated.'

'Then north it is.'

******************************************

They could hear the screams and bellows from some distance away. Viggo flew back from a reconnaissance mission, to land on Hutchinson's shoulder, and whistle and croak in her ear.

'It's a battle between a mastodon and a saber-toothed tiger,' said Hutchinson.

They crested the hill and looked down. Below them, the two huge animals were locked in deadly combat. The mastodon was huge. Its thick hide was covered with a massive coat, and its tusks were impressive with their great sweep.

The tiger, on the other hand, was a powerful predator, and its huge fangs were embedded in the mastodon's throat. The mastodon shook its head again, dislodging the tiger and lashed out with its tusks. The tiger lay on the ground for a moment, seemingly defeated. But it leapt to its feet and launched itself at the throat of its prey once more. The mastodon fell to its knees, moaning, and died.

The tiger got to its feet and began to tear at the mastodon's hide, but then it stopped and sniffed the air. Starsky and Hutchinson suddenly realized that they could become prey themselves and began to move off, but it was too late.

The tiger whirled and moved to the attack. Viggo had already changed into the form of a wolf even larger than the one he wore in their own world. Starsky drew his revolver, but when he tried to fire it, he found it wouldn't work. Perhaps such a weapon was useless in this world. He returned the revolver to its holster, and drew his knife instead.

Hutchinson circled behind the tiger, muttering something, as Viggo moved to attack. The tiger lashed out at the wolf, which drew back quickly. Seeing her moment, Hutchinson sprang onto the tiger's back and pulled back its head, then looked at Starsky, expectantly. Starsky was so astonished for a second, that he almost didn't react in time, but he recovered and sprang forward to cut the tiger's throat.

'You idiot,' he bellowed. 'You could have been killed.'

'We both could have been killed. But we weren't. That's the important thing.'

'Well, what made you so confident we could win the fight, anyway?'

'Watch,' said Hutchinson.

A strange keening sound rose from the body, then a wisp of silvery light left it and floated away, over the mountains to the north. Hutchinson turned to Starsky.

'That was a veneficus, using the body of an animal. I could read the signs that he was from our world, and I knew the spells to weaken him. There is our evidence of evil sorcery.'

'Don't you shape-change yourself? I mean, you did just change into a woman. So what makes this evil?'

'This, here, wasn't shape-changing. The veneficus took over the body of a living animal and used it. I can change my own shape, but I'd never use the body of another being, living or dead.'

'Why did the veneficus do it? Take over another body, I mean?'

'To gain the animal's power. Some steal the bodies of other humans. They start out with animals, then move up.'

'Ah. You're right. I can see the evil possibilities.'

Hutchinson was examining the dead bodies of the combatants. She picked up some chips of mastodon tusk, broken off in the battle. Then she looked at the body of the tiger. It had shrunk down to skin and bone.

She drew out her knife, and cleaned the skin, then cut the saber teeth from the skull.

'What are you doing?'

'Making us daggers. Watch.'

It took some time, but soon she had two rough daggers, with tiger-saber blades, and hilts of mastodon ivory, bound to the blades with the sinews of the tiger. She bound up the skull of the tiger in its skin. Then, out of a pouch on her belt, she drew a small box containing flint. When they had gathered enough wood, they built a fire. They cut some meat off the remains of the mastodon, and burnt it to ashes in the flames as a sacrifice to the Gods of this place. The burning meat smelt good, and Starsky was hungry, but not hungry enough to risk eating any. He hadn't seen much of this world, but what he had seen didn't tempt him to stay.

Hutchinson sat down by the fire, and began breathing the smoke.

'Oh, no! Not again,' said Starsky.

'Quiet. I need to do this. What happened here may have something to do with our being kidnapped to this Otherworld. We need to know what.'

'What if something goes wrong? I know nothing about all this.'

'Watch my back. Don't let anything interfere with my trance, no matter what. I'm going under much deeper than I did back at the sauna in our own world. That was inadvertent on my part, but this time it's intentional. There's a danger to me, if I'm brought out of a deep trance too quickly.'

'What kind of danger?'

'I could lose my mind, for one thing.'

'You've already lost your mind,' Starsky muttered. But he kept his hand on his dagger, as he stood nearby, watching for any threat. Hutchinson had begun that circling, swaying motion again, as she had in the sauna. This time, it went on much longer, and she began to shake and moan. Suddenly she fell over and lay on her back, shaking and sweating as if suffering from malaria.

It must have been an hour later, that she suddenly sat up and looked around. Starsky handed her one of the water skins, and she took a swallow, then handed it back.

'That wasn't enough,' Starsky said. 'Take some more.'

'We don't have much, and we don't know how long we'll be here.'

'I can do without. You've been sweating like a pig for an hour. You need it more than I do.'

'Well, thanks, but no thanks. I'll be fine.'

'Suit yourself. Did you learn anything?'

'Yes. It wasn't the veneficus that brought us here. We were brought here because of him, though.'

'How's that?'

'I'm not sure. There's a connection though. I saw wagons. A woman in a trance, like me, reaching out to us, but for help I think. We need to find her, she can give us the answers.'

'Or kill us.'

'Perhaps. But I don't think so. I felt the connection as a call for help.'

'Let's go then. Do you have any idea where?'

'North, again. That's where the spirit of the sorcerer went, when it left the body of the tiger.' 'Right. North it is.'

And so they started walking North, though Starsky wondered how far North they'd get, with no food and little water. He kept glancing at his companion, and finally couldn't restrain himself. 'Hutchinson?'

'Yes?'

'What did I do to make you hate me, all of a sudden? We were getting along fine last night.'

'It's not you. And I don't hate you.'

'Then what is it? You a Lesbian in this world, or something? I have a few Lesbian friends, and we get along fine. I'll quit trying to get you into bed, and we'll just be friends.'

'No, I'm not a Lesbian.'

'Do you just hate men, period, for no reason? I mean, that seems a bit strange considering that back in our own world you are a man, but....'

'Can't you drop it?'

Starsky turned to Hutchinson, and grabbed her arms, turning her to face him.

'No,' he said. 'I can't just drop it. Like I said, we were getting along fine, and I liked that. I liked kissing you last night. I wish I'd had more energy to finish what we started. Maybe we'd be getting along better now.'

'It wasn't me you kissed. Not me in this body.'

'Oh. Is that it? You don't like this body? You're ashamed of it? You're so macho, you can't stand to have tits like that? They're nothing to be ashamed of. Frankly, I'd be thrilled to have them, if I became a woman.'

'I'm sure you would. And no, I'm not ashamed.'

'Then what, for the Gods' sake?'

Hutchinson was silent for a long time. Then she sighed, and commented, 'Well, I guess you won't shut up until I explain. I'm a Seidhrman.'

'Yeah, so you said, already.'

'I'm not supposed to be. It's considered unmanly in Norway. All of Scandinavia, in fact. Always has been.'

'Why?'

'Because only women are supposed to do those things. Have trances. Travel between the worlds. If a man does it, it means he's not quite a man. Because things like this happen, such as changing our gender. I was married. To a woman, I mean. Then I started having the visions. She divorced me.'

'Why?'

'I think she just married me because of my family connections, and now I was the black sheep of the family. No longer such a good catch. But she said I wasn't man enough for her.'

'Ah. Well, I couldn't care less about your family connections, or whether or not they've disowned you. Who are they anyway?'

'The Hutchinsons? Related to the Norse Royal Family. Fair number of family members in the Thing.'

'The Thing?'

'The Norse Parliament.'

'Some of my ancestors were horse thieves. I'm not proud.'

'You don't like politicians?'

'Not so you'd notice.'

'Neither do I.'

'Well now, see, we've got something in common. And I still like your tits, despite your family connections. Can you forgive me for being a prick, and then maybe we'll get along better?'

'Are you a prick?'

'Of course. I'm a man. You were a man not long ago, don't you remember being a prick?'

'I'll be a man again, when we get back to our own world. Not man enough for my ex wife, though.'

'Man enough for me.'

'Really? You don't mind this manifestation of my inner being.'

'I'm not sure what a manifestation is exactly. I'm just a simple Roman soldier. But I don't mind anything about you.'

 

They had been walking for many hours now, and the sun was lower in the sky, but showed no sign of dipping below the horizon.

'It's summer here. We must be in the same latitude as Norway, because the sun never sets at home in summer either.'

'That must be tiring. I'd like to get some rest soon. Maybe seal our new friendship with a little lovemaking. If you have no objections, I mean?'

'No. No objections. But there's a problem.'

'What?'

Hutchinson was about to answer, when they heard bells, off to the West and coming nearer. They stopped walking to see what was coming, and over the hill came a wagon train. Gypsy wagons. Riders on horseback.

'Wagons,' said Hutchinson. 'There were wagons in my vision. I remember now.'

They moved off the beaten path, and waited for the wagons in the shade of a small grove of trees. When the train drew up to them, a voice called out an order and the train stopped. An ancient withered face appeared at the end of the lead wagon. A hand waved them in.

A very old woman sat on a stool just inside the wagon. She said something to them in a language neither knew, then tried another. After several attempts, she said something that Hutchinson recognized. Soon Hutchinson and the ancient woman were engaged in a stilted conversation, that nevertheless answered some of their questions.

'She says that they have been looking for us. They've sent a message to one of their other groups of searchers. That wagon train should arrive tomorrow. Their chief sorceress is with it, and when she arrives, she will tell us everything. This lady refuses to say anything more.'

'Maybe with good reason. You didn't look to be communicating too easily. She might not be able to make things clear for us, and just cause more confusion.'

'You're right. Anyway, they're giving us a wagon to ourselves for the night. I told them we were married, just in case they have conservative ideas.'

'That's nice. Let's not disappoint them.'

'Mmm?'

'Let's act married.'

'What? Sleep in separate beds?'

'Boy. You have a fine idea of marriage.'

'I was married. Were you?'

'No. But I am now, remember. And I intend to raise your opinion of marriage. And of me.'

'Humble, aren't you?'

'I have no reason to be.'

********************************************

'So, have you ever had sex with a man? In that beautiful body, I mean?'

'In this body, I've never had sex with anyone.'

'Never? You're a virgin? Why? Don't you? Can't you?'

Hutchinson laughed at Starsky's horrified expression, and near incoherence.

'I'm not in this body that often, or for that long. So it's not that much of a sacrifice. And as for why, well, it's the same reason that we can't eat or drink the food here. We'd be trapped here forever if we had sex with someone from this dimension.'

'Ah. But you and I could? I mean, if you'd like to, I'd like to.'

Hutchinson smiled. 'Poor baby. It's been a while, has it?'

'Let's see now. I've lost count of time, what with the endless nights and the shift to the Otherworld, but I'd say about a week. The longest I've gone since my first time.'

'When was that?'

'Fifteen years ago. I was ten.'

'I see. I guess this has been a terrible deprivation for you.'

'What about you?'

'Me? I was fifteen. He was a friend of mine. We were together for a while. Then my first girl friend. Then my wife.'

'Then?'

'Then? Then nothing. I've been busy,' she said, coldly.

Starsky was silent, for a long time.

'Do you want to?'

'I'd like to, but maybe I'm neither man enough, nor woman enough for you.'

'You're plenty of both. Of each. Either one of you is just plenty.'

'What about when we get back to our own dimension? I'll be back in a man's body then. Maybe you'll miss this body. Be disappointed.'

'Never. I promise.'

****************************************

'Lie back. Like that. That's good. You're so beautiful. There. Open your legs really wide. It makes it easier.'

'I know, I've done it from the other side.'

'Shh. Don't think about that. Just be here with me, okay?'

'Sorry.'

'Nothing to be sorry for, sweetheart. That's not what I meant. I mean, this is your first time, in this body. Relax. Don't think about the other times, in another body, or you'll drive yourself crazy, to say nothing of me. This is your first time, remember? But I've had more experience than you can possibly imagine.'

Starsky ran his hands gently up the inside of her thighs and parted the soft outer lips of her vulva. Inside, were the moist inner folds, the sweet doorway leading to her vagina, and the tiny bud of her clitoris. He touched that very softly, trying several different rhythms and patterns until he found the right one, the one that made her moan, and strain to open her legs even wider.

When she seemed so lost in pleasure that she scarcely knew what he was doing, he pushed one finger inside her vagina, then leaned down closer and kissed the soft folds of her vulva. Hutchinson gasped and tried to move away. Starsky looked up. She was flushed, and some of that was with embarrassment. He smiled. 'Sweet. You taste delicious.' He leaned over her again and licked her clitoris, then drew it into his mouth and sucked. She cried out and suddenly, she was climaxing, her vagina tightening around his finger.

While she was still lost in her paroxysms of pleasure, Starsky made his move. He rose over her, and pushed his cock inside.

She was tight, but moist and ready, and he managed to fit most of himself inside her. He began to stroke her clitoris again. Within moments she had her second orgasm, and then Starsky began to thrust.

At his first hard thrust, she lost all control. Whatever language she spoke it certainly wasn't any form of Latin Starsky knew. Nor did it bear any resemblance to the Norse Starsky had heard her speak. But Starsky understood. He went on thrusting, pushing her thighs wider apart, reaching between their bodies to touch her where their bodies joined, adding his own obscene commentary to the dialogue between them, until they climaxed together, and fell back, panting and dripping with sweat.

'Well,' managed Starsky after a long silence.

'That was worth the wait.'

********************************************

The next morning, the Gypsy sorceress arrived in her wagon. She was able to communicate in their language, she had a lot of news, and she wanted to give it to Hutchinson alone.

'No,' said Hutchinson. 'Starsky is with me. He is my partner, and we share everything.'

'He is a man.'

'So am I, in our own world.'

And so Starsky was allowed in the wagon. Once there, they learned that it was indeed the sorceress who had brought them to this world.

'I didn't kidnap you intentionally, for reasons of a personal vendetta. I asked to be sent someone who could handle this problem that came from your world. Here is what I have learned. There is a sorcerer who has been travelling from your world to ours. He has been using the bodies of animals, and now is even taking the bodies of our people. I know of two such cases. His own form here is that of a man, but with the scales of a serpent, instead of skin.' 'Ah,' said Hutchinson.

'That's significant?' asked Starsky.

'It may be. There is a kin, a familias, that uses the serpent on their coat of arms. They have long been rumoured to use the Dark Arts. I'm speaking of the family of my ex wife. After she divorced me, she took up with one of my cousins. They're very ambitious.'

'You think they're in this together?'

'For wealth and power? Yes. We should return to our cave and make the journey home.' 'That's a good idea, but I don't know how much longer I can go without eating. I'm a soldier, and I'm tough, but an army marches on its stomach, you know.'

The sorceress spoke up. 'We will lend you horses, and I will ride with you and reverse that spell which brought you here. You should return to your own world at nearly the time which you left it. But there is more which I must tell you. When I was in a trance, tracking the evil sorcerer, I saw him conjure up a storm. The storm caused a shipwreck, and many died, but some lived. This man was among them,' she said, and she looked at Starsky.

**********************************************

'We should start for Oslo now, Starsky. It will take some days, and we need to be there, before the Thing closes for Yule.'

'The Thing?'

'The Norse Parliament. I told you that before, remember? Quit laughing. We need to let them know what's going on. The attack on the delegation from the Empire could lead to war. Who knows what's going on in the capital, or indeed in Rome.'

'Oh, there's always something going on in Rome. But we need to get something going on here and now, just you and me.'

'Yes. That's what I'm saying. Get ready. Let's go.'

'Hold on a minute, Hutchinson. We have to settle a few things between us first.'

'There's no time, Starsky.'

'We have to make time. Look, Hutchinson, as you said, it will take us days to make the journey, and a few hours won't make much difference. Out there in the wilderness, on such a long trek, there won't be much of an opportunity for love. We have to take time, now. Let's get this settled, Baby.'

'Don't.'

'Don't what?'

'I'm not still a woman, Starsky. Don't call me Baby.'

'Did I say you were?'

'No. But now that you... What my Otherworld persona... I mean if you're expecting me to....'

'I'm expecting you to get those clothes off again, and to get into that bed with me, and to return the favour I did you last night. Hey, I screwed you for hours. Now it's my turn.'

'Starsky?'

'Yes. That's it. Come on. Let me see that beautiful body again.'

'It's not the same body.'

'No. It's another beautiful body. You have two, and I get to fuck two. I'm the luckiest man alive.' 'I'm not the same person I was there.' 'While we were riding back to the cave, the sorceress told me that the form you take when you're in one of the Otherworlds reveals a basic truth. A basic truth. Not the only truth. An important one perhaps.'

'Yes. I'm not all man. But I won't be treated like dirt under your feet, either,' Hutchinson declared.

'Who said you were going to be?'

'Never mind. Look we really don't have the time for this.'

'Who treated you like dirt under their feet? I want to know, Hutchinson. I want to know, so that I can cut his heart out and eat it in the marketplace.'

'I can fight my own battles. I don't need a protector.'

'Whoa, whoa, whoa. Back up, here. Did I say 'protector'? You keep putting words in my mouth, instead of what I want you to put there. This is why I want us to slow down, stop talking and fuck. Now! Come on, Baby. Come here to me.'

Starsky lay back on the bed of furs and opened his legs wide in invitation.

'Look in my pack. There's a flask of oil.'

'You carry oil around with you?'

'All Roman soldiers carry oil. We rub it on our feet to prevent athletes foot. And we rub it here when we want to be fucked. Just at the moment, I'm not worried about athletes foot. But I sure am worried about getting fucked. Jupiter's Balls! That thing's big. Put lots on it, Stud. That's it. Want me to help?'

'No. I think I can manage.'

'Mmm. Yeah. Manage me. Can you find it? Ooh. Right there. That's enough stretching, I think.'

'I'll say when there's been enough stretching.'

'Oh. Okay. You're the master.'

'Starsk!'

'What? Oh. That's big. That's really big.'

'Shut up.'

'Yes, Sir.'

'Starsk!'

'Shh. Come on, Baby. Give it to me hard. Like I did to you last night. Make me yours.'

'Starsky!'

'That's my Hutch.'

*******************************************

The streets of Oslo were brightly lit, so brightly lit that Starsky wished out loud for his sunglasses, which made Hutch laugh. Hutch laughed much more easily and often now, Starsky noted. They walked to the chambers of The Thing, side by side, shoulders touching, thighs sometimes brushing. Viggo paced beside them, back in the shape of a wolf.

At the door to the Chambers of the Norse Parliament, Hutch demanded entrance.

'I am Kenneth Hutchinson, and this is my partner, David Starsky. He was a member of the Roman Delegation which was shipwrecked off the coast two weeks ago. We have news about this accident which we must give to The Thing.'

The Guard refused to let them in.

'It's the last session, before the break for Yule, he announced, 'The Thing doesn't need to deal with you and your problems.'

Hutch looked around and noticed his mother coming towards them.

'Mother, can you get us inside? We need to make a declaration about a very important state matter.'

'Kenneth? What are you doing here? You were going to stay away from Oslo. You promised your father.'

'Mother! There isn't time. This is David, my lover. Say hello to him nicely, then get us inside the Chambers. It's important. More important than my father's petty feelings.'

Mrs. Hutchinson sighed, but she greeted Starsky warmly enough, then vouched for them to enter the Chambers.

'Your family are politicians, aren't they?'

'My family are a pain in the ass for the most part, but yes. You'll meet more of them soon enough. And some of them won't be too happy to see me here.'

'Don't worry about that.'

They marched into the Chambers and Starsky took over.

'I am a member of the Roman Delegation sent here by the Emperor himself. Two weeks ago, we were shipwrecked. The shipwreck was caused by evil sorcery and witchcraft. The sorcerer who committed this vile, murderous act is in this very Chamber.'

The uproar was tremendous. Among the shouts and whistles of anger and surprise, Hutch could hear his father and brother telling him to shut up and leave. He ignored them.

'Silence!' Starsky bellowed, and in the resulting moment of shock, he continued.

'I accuse Olaf Hutchinson of being an evil veneficus and of plotting the deaths of the Emperor's delegation to Norway.'

In the resulting tsunami of rage, Hutch's cousin and his ex wife stood up and regarded him with loathing and contempt.

'My cousin is a seidhrman and a male whore who uses sex magic to gain power. Are you going to listen to him and his....'

Olaf Hutchinson never got to finish his sentence, since Starsky dragged him out of his seat and threw him on the floor at Hutch's feet. Hutch hadn't even seen his lover move. Neither, apparently, had Olaf, for he gaped up at Starsky in shock.

'You will take that lie back, or die.'

There were cries for the Parliamentary Guard and some members of the Thing made a move to stop Starsky, but he drew his saber tooth dagger and stood his ground.

'In case you didn't hear me the first time, I am a member of the Emperor's delegation to this country, and thus, I have diplomatic immunity. I was appointed one of the bodyguards to the delegation, and thus, I have a warrant to investigate any threat against the delegation, to make accusations and to serve justice. This man has insulted me, and my lover and partner, and thus, I have the legal right to claim restitution or to challenge him to a duel to prove his claims. I challenge Olaf Hutchinson to a duel to the death.'

For the first time since they had entered the Chambers there was silence. After a moment, the Prime Minister broke that silence to say that he believed that Starsky had the right of it on all counts. Another member raised his voice to question whether or not Starsky was who he claimed to be.

'He is,' said a voice from the doorway. Everyone turned. At the entrance to the Chambers stood two bedraggled figures.

'Marcus! Joshua!'

'Hello, David. I see that you survived the shipwreck as well. Mr. Prime Minister, most of the members of my delegation to your country died when our ship sank. Captain Starsky was, in fact, one of our bodyguards, and is not known to make frivolous charges. I will vouch for his integrity.'

'Be it noted. Olaf Hutchinson, will you withdraw your comments, or face Captain Starsky in a duel?'

'There is no reason for me to withdraw. My cousin is a male whore, and this man must be another. I will fight him immediately.'

'So be it. Anyone who wishes to witness the combat may adjourn to the City Square, outside the Temple of Apollo, in one hour.'

********************************************

'Starsky, I don't know if this is wise or necessary.'

'Be quiet, Hutch.'

'What? Starsky, I....'

'Hutch, I followed you and obeyed you without question in the Otherworld. Now it's your turn to obey me in this. Give me your hand. Now, wear this ring, and guard it. If something should happen to me, anytime in the future, take it to Rome and ask for the head of the Starsky family. Tell them you are my legal spouse and the heir to all my possessions. You are a member of my family and they will treat you well, whatever your own blood kin does. Ah! Marcus, Joshua, come here and be our witnesses. Kenneth Hutchinson, I swear that you have saved my life, and shared with me bed and board. We are one soul. Give me your dagger and take this one. Come on, strap it on my waist. That's it. Well, it's your turn.'

'Starsky. I love you. There's no need for this. It doesn't matter what Olaf thinks of me.'

'That will have to do as a vow, I suppose. Have you witnessed our joining?'

'Fiat,' said the two men.

'Okay. Let's go.'

'Starsky, please.'

Starsky grabbed Hutch and kissed him long and deeply.

'That's better. I need to carry the taste of you with me into battle.'

*****************************************

The square outside the Temple of Apollo was crowded with onlookers. Few had expected to be treated to such a rare Yule entertainment as a duel of honour.

'Olaf Hutchinson, I give you one more chance to take back your lying words. This is a fight to the death and I will show no mercy.'

'My cousin is a male whore. He lay under me like a Babylonian slut, and begged me to fuck him. He is no man.'

'You will die for those words.'

Duels of honour were not a staple of life in Oslo, as they were in other parts of the Empire. Perhaps Olaf had not heard of Starsky's reputation, suggested Marcus and Joshua, who watched in amusement as their friend toyed with Olaf as a cat with a mouse.

Starsky's agile grace fascinated Hutch, who could almost forget the reason for this battle to the death, until Starsky had Olaf down on the ground and without offering another chance for his opponent to recant, slit the man's throat from ear to ear.

He cut open the man's chest and removed his heart with almost surgical precision. Next, he cut out Olaf's tongue. Then, he stuck them on the point of his dagger, and carried them across the Square, to Hutch.

He announced, 'This is what will happen to anyone who insults Kenneth Hutchinson, the lover of David Starsky.'

He threw the heart and the tongue at Hutch's feet.

*** The End ***


End file.
